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How To Handle Traditions Associated With Marriage?

Colossians 2:8
See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ.

Scripture strictly call us to follow principles of Christ and warns us never to follow the traditions of this world and other religions.

Joshua 23:6-8
6 "Be very strong; be careful to obey all that is written in the Book of the Law of Moses, without turning aside to the right or to the left.
7 Do not associate with these nations that remain among you; do not invoke the names of their Gods or swear by them. You must not serve them or bow down to them.
8 But you are to hold fast to the LORD your God, as you have until now.

Mark 7:1-8
1 The Pharisees and some of the teachers of the law who had come from Jerusalem gathered around Jesus and
2 saw some of his disciples eating food with hands that were "unclean," that is, unwashed.
3 (The Pharisees and all the Jews do not eat unless they give their hands a ceremonial washing, holding to the tradition of the elders.
4 When they come from the marketplace they do not eat unless they wash. And they observe many other traditions, such as the washing of cups, pitchers and kettles.)
5 So the Pharisees and teachers of the law asked Jesus, "Why don't your disciples live according to the tradition of the elders instead of eating their food with 'unclean' hands?"
6 He replied, "Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you hypocrites; as it is written: "'These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.
7 They worship me in vain; their teachings are but rules taught by men.'
8 You have let go of the commands of God and are holding on to the traditions of men."

Scriptures are very clear that we should not follow any religious traditions for any reason.

What are some traditions related to marriage that can be brought up by your families?

No. Traditions What Should We Do With It?

Age of the bride (girl) should be less than the age of the bridegroom (boy). (This is not a religious tradition but a usual way of thinking - more philosophical)

We should not be worried about the age at all.


Matching the stars of the Bride & Bridegroom

Our trust should be on God who made the stars.


Auspicious day - certain months in a year is not good for marriage; certain days are not good, certain time of the day is good and other times are bad (Muhurtham, Rahu & Gulika Kalam etc.)

God is in control of the time. Your married life is going to be good or bad according to the way you live. The time or day that you get married has no effect on your life.


Bow down and touch the feet of the elders in family before getting engaged or married.

We worship only one God. Respect your parents or elders in family. If they want to pray for you, let them do it. If they want to even place their hands on your head and pray, it is up to them. But do not kneel down or touch their feet.


Tying 'Thali'. Yellow chord. Mangalasootram, tying thali with a chord with three knots etc.

Tying a thali around the neck of the bride is a Hindu tradition. Faith in Mangalasootram is traditional. Do not tie a chord (or thread of any color). If they want, bridegroom can put a chain around the neck of the bride and put the hook as a token of love. If necessary, there can be a small pendant. Using the Thali with the shape of female body part is not acceptable.

There should not be any picture of pagan Gods or inscriptions related to them. There can be a small cross or cross can be engraved on the pendant. We should not advice them to do even that. (If they ask permission to use a small cross or pendant with cross engraved on it, then you can say yes to it.)


Some families don't allow the husband and wife to stay together on the day they get married.

It is a wrong tradition. "Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate." Matthew 19:6

Have deep convictions about not following the traditions of the world.

Sector leaders must ask each person, what are the traditions their families may bring in or force them to follow and give appropriate advice!